The Woman Who Tried to Be Normal Page 24

  “Life. Why we live the way we do.” Eirwen noticed the hairs on her arm had risen.

  A small smile formed on the Queen’s heavily powdered face. “Do you mind if I join you?”

  For some reason, that made Eirwen very nervous. “Why not? So long you don’t bring vine up this time,” she said and regretted it the second after.

  The Queen’s eyes had taken on a tinge of spite and under the dim light of the moon, her face now looked somewhat cruel.

  “That was horrible,” Eirwen said very quickly. “Sorry. I’ll join you, give me a minute.”

  A minute later, she stood in front of the expressionless Queen who seemed to tower over her in a rather menacing manner even though she was only slightly taller. Eirwen reminded herself that this was the same woman who had only just yesterday clung onto her and shared all her troubles, but it was hard to believe that in front of this face. “In truth, I came back because I was worried about you,” she said after her feet took a few steps backwards all by themselves.

  “What do you worry about?”

  “That you’d try to hang yourself again. Tonight, or any other night.” Her heart began to race because of the way the Queen was staring into her eyes so she decided to keep her eyes on the grass instead.

  “Really? That’s interesting since it would be better for you if I weren’t here, wouldn’t it?”

  “Why would it be?” Eirwen looked up and away almost immediately for those eyes were still on her.

  “You would be able to come out of hiding, get close to the King again. Go to Balls, enter the West of the castle.”

  Eirwen laughed, if only to release some of the nerves that were beginning to eat through her skin. “How then do you think I got you back to your chamber last night?”

  “They let you?”

  “They wouldn’t dare. I use the servants’ staircase.” She smiled and shrugged. “And no, I don’t want to come out of hiding or go to Balls because the last time I went to one, every single man wanted to marry me on sight. Not because I was wonderful or kind or what not but because everybody knew I was the richest person on the dance floor.”

  The Queen stared hard but said nothing.

  “So whatever you think you did, don’t worry about it.” Eirwen gave her a pat on the shoulder.

  The Queen flinched at once. “You expect me to believe you have nothing against me? Why, the first day we met, you kicked me and told me to get the hell out.”

  There was nothing calm about the Queen’s manner now. Her eyes were shining. Dangerously so. “Well,” Eirwen began as she retrieved her arm and straightened out her body. “I might have not expressed myself too well because I was six, but telling you to get the hell out was for your sake.”

  “My sake?”

  “I was afraid you’d end up like Queen Susanna.”

  The Queen sneered. “You were afraid I’d fall ill?”

  Eirwen’s eyebrows went up and she laughed. “Is that what they told you?”

  The sneer went away at once. The Queen crossed her arms. “Tell me then.”

  “You don’t want to kn—”

  “Tell me!”

  How different people are when they are sober! Eirwen took a deep breath. “A month before you got here, I found Queen Susanna on her bed with porcelain in her throat. There was blood on everything. So I thought why not warn the next person dumb enough to want to be Queen.”

  Now the Queen looked taken aback. Her eyelids flickered ever so slightly. “You expect me to believe you over my own husband?”

  “You can believe whatever you want. All I ask is that you don’t kill yourself here. Not on my family’s land. The history of this castle is bad enough as it is. Don’t add to the number. Please.”

  The Queen stared and for the first time that night, she looked away. Far away with her arms tight across her body. She said nothing.

  “I’m sure we can find alternative ways of solving your problems, Queen Katherine.”

  Those green eyes flicked back onto hers just as a strange redness appeared across the Queen’s cheeks. “Is that why… you kissed me?” the Queen said. So softly, it was almost a whisper.

  Eirwen did not know how to respond to that.

  “When did I ever… kiss you?”

  The redness on the Queen’s cheeks spread towards her ears. “Last night. Right here.” She turned her head and refused to look at Eirwen this time.

  Eirwen laughed a little. “It wasn’t... a kiss. I was just trying to give you some air.”

  The Queen nodded and those green eyes shot back, now full of ferocity. “Do that again and I will have you beheaded for incest and treason. That’s what I came here to tell you. Stay away from me.” She cast her cloak back and stormed off as abruptly as she had appeared.

  Eirwen watched her go, her laughter silenced. Her skin crawled and her heart pounded like it did with exertion. Oh that’s right. That’s why I keep away from that woman.

  But when her eyes fell to the ground again, Eirwen remembered how frantically that very same woman had prevented her from removing her arms from her body the night before.

  That woman was so desperate for love and concern. So thankful for every little touch, every little embrace. Her eyes had been wide with need the whole time.

  Where did that needy woman go? Was she still there under the Queen’s show of ferociousness? Eirwen frowned.

  She never forgot the expression Queen Susanna had on her face the night she found her dead.

  She knew very well she never wanted to see a thing like that ever again.

  *****

  Once back in her chambers, Katherine threw herself against the closed door, clutched her chest and took many deep breaths.

  Why in the world was she this nervous? This never happened before. Not to Katherine the Queen. She was the one who always held her ground no matter what any opponent threw at her. She never quivered. Especially not when faced with a woman that much younger, with less power than she had. So why on earth was she shaking now?

  She should have listened to herself and stayed away. What in the world was she thinking? The enemy had seen her at her weakest and clearly knew all the right words to say. Who knew how she would use all that against Katherine? Tell the King? Spread ugly rumours about her? Katherine wished she never mentioned the kiss. A trap, she knew that now.

  Her deep breaths did not work. Her skin still tingled and her heart still raced. Katherine paced her chamber until she ended up at the window. Against her will, she put her nose to it.

  From where she stood, only the roof of the East Tower could be seen. The rest of it was shrouded from view by the body of the castle.

  But she already knew that, didn’t she? She tried all morning to see and failed. Katherine dropped her shoulders and leaned her forehead against the cool glass. Something was wrong.

  The enemy up on the tree had looked incredibly stunning with the wind in her hair. There was just something about her that made Katherine want to keep looking and looking. And looking.

  Stop it, Katherine! It’s another trap! Katherine pulled away from the window and went to pour herself a tall drink which she downed in one gulp. Tomorrow, she would send guards to stand at the servants’ entrances to the West Wing. That should keep her safe, for a while.

  A knock on the door made her jump. The King!

  Katherine cursed under her breath and dashed towards one of the lounge chairs in the sitting chamber, making sure her hair was in place as she went. She was not in the mood for a visit from him right now but how do you say such a thing to the King and get to keep your head? Instead, she lay down on her side with her head propped up by her arm and made her face seductive.

  Another knock.

  “Come in,” Katherine said and thought quickly about how to inform him of that inconvenient time of the month in a way that would be least likely to infuriate him.

  The tall door opened and in walked not the King
but his daughter with her wild long hair cascading recklessly down one side. “I don’t mean to disturb,” she said. “But can we talk for a minute?”

  Katherine was disturbed all the same. Her heart jumped right back into race mode at the sight of that very woman and she found herself in that giddy mix of wanting and resistance all over again. It took everything she had to keep a straight face and say in a steady, disinterested voice, “What is it you want?”

  “To say a few words. We kind of ended oddly just now and I just want to set things proper.”

  Katherine sat up right away. “Make it quick.”

  The young woman moved towards the Queen. “I won’t touch your lips again, I promise. And I know you find me a threat. Understandably, considering what I did to you when we first met. But that was many years ago and I’ve grown up a lot since.”

  Without letting expression show on her face, Katherine took in the young woman’s perfect features once again and that slender body. Then, she noticed the hand the woman held behind her back.

  At the beat of a heart, all her apprehensions jumped right back into awareness. What had felt like nervous excitement morphed into nervous fear in that instant. Could there be a dagger in that fair hand?

  “The King and I don’t speak, in case you’re worried about that. Not because of you, so don’t worry about that either.”

  The woman was getting closer with every step yet her hand never once left her back.

  “I know it’s lonely at the top. Especially since you don’t talk to servants or courtiers and so on.”

  Katherine felt herself backing away ever so slightly for that woman was almost right in front of her now.

  “But I think you should know that if you ever need a listening ear, I’m here for you. So I brought you something.” The woman stopped right in front of her and pulled that hand out from behind her back.

  Katherine threw her arms up in defence at once. But nothing hit her.

  Instead, what the hand held out made her heart race for an entirely different reason.

  Katherine gaped at the blood red apple the young woman presented to her.

  “Don’t worry,” the woman said quickly. “It’s just a gift. To remind you of all the wonders in the world worth staying alive for.”

  Katherine could only stare.

  “Bet you’ve never tasted an uncooked apple, have you?”

  The woman was both wrong and right. Katherine remembered the taste she encountered when those lips in front of her met hers and presumed it was what uncooked apples tasted like. The memory made her mouth water and she began to feel like she might just pass out from the frantic pounding of her heart.

  So Katherine did the only thing she could in that moment. She folded her arms and looked away.

  The woman nodded and placed the apple on the table next to her. “You know where I live. Know that you’re welcome anytime.” With a small smile, she turned and left the chamber.

  Katherine did not move for a long time after that. When she did at last, her eyes jumped right onto the bright red apple on her gold-gilded side table.

  It could be poisoned. After all, that was the way the King once got rid of a nobleman he detested. Sent him off on his way with a generous basket of fruit and everyone thought the man died of exhaustion. Why would his daughter not think of doing the same thing?

  Yet Katherine could not resist. She picked up the apple and brought it to her nose, letting the fine scent of fresh juice seep into her senses as the smooth texture of its skin caressed her lips.

  It reminded her once again of that woman’s lips on hers. Not a kiss, she knew that now, but so soft, tender and lovely all the same.

  The enemy was formidable. Katherine threw herself back against the chair and frowned. If that young woman was trying to win her over for the sake of eventual revenge, she was most definitely succeeding.

  Nevertheless, the apple remained tightly held in Katherine’s hand.

  Chapter 3

  The five maids-in-waiting who dressed the Queen in her boudoir the next morning noticed something unusual about her behaviour.

  As she raised her arms to let them put a fine gown over her farthingale, the Queen’s mouth curled in a way it had never done before. Upwards on one side, just a little. Yet as subtle as the change was, it seemed to make all the difference to her face. For the first time ever, the Queen looked that little bit less unkind.

  Heartened by the change, the maids worked with gratitude, thinking the day would be a peaceful one. But then, the Queen opened her mouth and that familiar sense of dread hit them all once again.

  “Did any of you know Queen Susanna’s maids-in-waiting personally?” the Queen said with that same unaffected manner she used at the beginning of every dreadful conversation with them.

  All five felt their faces drain of blood. They now sorely wished they had never come to work at the castle.

  “Speak up when you’re spoken to!”

  The bravest of them all took a deep breath and said, “No, your highness.”

  The Queen rolled her eyes. “Can you at least tell me where they are now?”

  The five of them immediately realised where this conversation might be going. One of them bit down on her lip and inwardly cursed the Queen’s twisted heart as tears welled up in her eyes.

  “In heaven, your highness,” the bravest one said. This time, she was not able to stop her voice from quivering.

  “All five of them?”

  “Yes, your highness.”

  “How? Was there a plague?”

  Hate for her thickened in all their hearts. What sick game was this Queen playing? The teary maid could no longer control herself and burst into sobs.

  “What in goodness sakes is the matter with you?” the Queen asked.

  Another one of the maids burst into tears as well. She fell onto her knees and begged, “Please don’t send us to the gallows, your highness, please! We’ll do better next time. Please give us a chance!”

  The Queen simply gaped at her.

  “What happened to Queen Susanna’s five maids-in-waiting?!” she said to those not crying.

  The bravest one was trembling now. She bowed her head and refused to look the Queen in the eye. “You ordered they be sent to the gallows, your highness,” she replied.

  “I did no such thing!”

  The five looked at each other in panic and for a long time, none of them knew how to respond.

  “We believe you, your highness,” one of them said at last.

  “No, I mean it, I absolutely did no such thing!”

  All five heads bobbed up and down in frantic nods. Not one of them looked her in the eye. Four of them were crying now.

  The Queen rolled her eyes.

  “When did I send them to the gallows? I never even met those girls!”

  The bravest one lost her wits and began to tear as well. How could one answer a trick question like that? Any answer could very well lead her and her co-workers right to the gallows. There was no knowing what this insane Queen was playing.

  “Just tell me when!”

  “The day you entered the court, your highness,” the bravest one mumbled as tears began flowing down her cheeks.

  “Who told you that?”

  “The Head Maid-in-waiting.”

  “And who told her that?”

  “The courtiers of Housekeeping.”

  “Who gave them the orders?”

  “His highness the King, your highness.” She too began to heave and sob as noisily as the rest of them.

  The Queen looked terribly annoyed. “Stop that this instant! All of you! Why would I tell the King to send them to the gallows?!”

  None of the five red-faced, wet-eyed maids would look up at her or answer.

  “I promise to send none of you to the gallows,” the Queen said eventually. “Now please tell me exactly what happened to Queen Susanna’s maids.”

 
It was a long while before the bravest one found the courage to face her fate and speak to the woman who had the power to end her life.

  “You told the King you could not stand the sight of them and demanded they all be hung at once, your highness.”

  It was then, for the second time in her entire span of service, the bravest maid-in-waiting caught sight of a look of absolute horror on the heartless Queen’s cruel face.

  *****

  On three days every week—Wednesdays, Fridays and Sundays—the Royal Couple would meet for a private dinner just before midday at one of the many dining chambers around the castle.

  The three-hour affair was, to servants and people of the Kingdom, evidence of how much the King enjoyed the company of his beloved Queen. Behind closed doors however, it proved only the extent to which their marriage had faltered.

  There used to be laughter and conversation at these dinners. Loving mouthfuls of the finest foods handed to each other on fingertips amidst cuddles and pecks of sticky kisses.

  Not anymore. These days, they sat at opposite ends of the tables they found themselves at, separated by the excessive spreads of food.

  The King had long lost the inclination to say anything or even look at Katherine at these dinners. For years, she had respected that and behaved likewise. But not today.

  After a bite of baked porpoise, Katherine spoke. “I had a dream about the former Queen last night. She warned me to be careful of her maids-in-waiting. Do you know where they are?”

  The King’s bushy blond brows twitched a little but his eyes never looked up from his own plate.

  “It might be an omen.”

  “They’ve all gone home,” he said at last.

  “All of them?”

  “Yes. They were devastated by what happened.”

  “What did she die of again?”

  “I told you.”

  “I don’t remember what you said—”

  “Sweating sickness!” The King slammed his fist down on the table. “Enough of this! I simply refuse to discuss such obscene matters over dinner!”

  Katherine fell quiet and helped herself to a boiled apple from the spread. But she was not done yet.